When the Words Just... Blegh.

So what do you do when you're really motivated to write but when you sit down, your brain shuts down and refuses to cooperate? Turn on music? Drink some coffee? Yoga? Brain bribery? (Hey Brain, if you do this for me, I'll do the New York Times crossword alllll week.) Actually, I haven't tried that last one yet. But as I continue editing, I find that what I think I'm about to accomplish and what my actual creative output has in mind are in complete schizoid universes. So what does any average person sitting at the computer do when stumped? Why, we ask Google, of course!

"Dear Google, how do I get over writer's block?"

I like to show Google that I can be polite, so sometimes I ask it very nicely. First hit is a link to an

Entrepreneurial Ramblings

blog. That was a copy paste so that I didn't have to type out

Entrepreneurial

but I kind of like the effect. It does sound very important. However, the second link had six whole ideas for me to get my groove back. Courtesy of problogservice.com, the first point of advice was to carry a notebook with you at all times. I'd love to, but my job makes it rather difficult, so I skipped to number two: write something else. Okay, but while editing? Maybe not. Step three, then. Write it in an email instead. Yeah, still not for the editing, but clever! Number four? Pick a different environment. Now that was something I'd done before, and sure enough, I can usually crack down on at least a few more paragraphs. Step five was to write nonsense. Again, editing. And lucky you and lucky me, the last one on the list ended up being the most help out of all the other "feel good" solutions.

QUIT WAITING TO BE INSPIRED.

And yes, I was the one who put it in all caps. Because I'M YELLING AT MY BRAIN. Sometimes I think we let ourselves get suckered by all the creative writing classes we had to take in school or by the romantic ideas of having completed a piece of work. When it comes down to it, if I really want to polish that pile of crud I spewed out during NaNo, I can't just sit and mope about how that one sentence really just wasn't exactly how I wanted to express the cut of the character's jacket. I will never, ever finish editing if I treat my novel like a delicate little flower. No, this bitch is more like fresh bread dough. I'm going to stir it up, pound the shit out of it, leave it alone for a couple hours, then pound the shit out of it some more. Now if you'll excuse me..

I have a novel that needs edited. May you be as angrily inspired as I am.

New House

So last fall, I came back from vacation and some very dear friends of ours sent us a sheepish message informing us that they bought a house. Of course, I was pretty flabbergasted. We had only been gone about a week, and they went off and bought a house? But the more we talked to them about it, the more we came to realize, that especially in this economy....

we might be able to buy a house.

What.

I was torn between feeling extraordinarily grown up and responsible and also wanting to have a winning lottery ticket show up in my mailbox, because houses are lots and lots of dollars.

So we did the sensible thing and had a little chat with the realtor who had found our friends the cutest damn house. And guess what? Now we're buying a house.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's a short sale with two loans involved, and our lovely, wonderful, saintly patient realtors warned us that it might take a few months if not longer for everything to go through the proper channels. Luckily, it hasn't. We got the call two days ago that our offer was approved, and now the inspection is scheduled for Friday. This Friday. For my pretty new house. (Assuming they don't find that the foundation was built over a volcanic slime pit of mold or something. But we're hoping for the best.) So what does this mean for me? And for NaNo?

Remodeling. And decorating. And lots and lots of painting. And one of the best parts of all is that it has a deck off the upper level. It's a split level, so the deck isn't quite as high as a second story would be, which is just awesome. This is especially relevant with warm weather creeping in through the weeks. I was thinking the other day while editing how fantastic it would be to set up the deck with pillows and cushions and blankets and a weather-proof outlet so that I could plug in my laptop and lounge about outside while writing? I then proceeded to give myself a high-five and create a Pinterest board for all the lovely ideas that I will try valiantly to recreate on my budget.

In celebration of this, I am going to pry myself off the internet and go pack so very many things.

Beer

Just so we're clear, I love beer.

Editing

Really? Editing? You might be thinking what I was thinking. NO FUCKING WAY. I don't edit my stories. I do, in fact, abhor my previous writing attempts. But it just happened that way. It was a crummy day, I was pissed off, drank a few beers, and then *BAM*, out comes the laptop and I'm clacking away on a first edit of His Boys, my first completed NaNo. In this process, I have realised one very, very important thing.

It really wasn't as bad as I thought it was.

Mind you, I may still never see it as publishable material, but I think I'm growing rather fond of a world where my detective has a chance to at least see the light of day once in a while. This of course leads to other dark and twisted thoughts. Thoughts like actually finishing and polishing up my most recent NaNo accomplishment, Angel Tears. If Alex gets a chance, why not the rest of my characters?

Who knows, I may turn into a writer yet. Or an alcoholic. They're certainly not mutually exclusive.